During the morning, ‘Wake Up Call’ for an organization I was involved in, years ago, people from around the world would call into this toll free number to listen to the company’s version of a start-your-day-pep-talk.
We would listen on our speaker phones as the host would discuss some things to focus on to keep us working toward our business goals. There would be stories or quotes of the day to remind us of how we are responsible for the productivity of our day.
The one tip that I recall the most was the phrase, ‘Press Reset’. The fellow who always said this, I think his first name was Joe, insisted that every morning and every day was an opportunity to start fresh. Whether we did or didn’t meet our intentions from the previous day, we were to ‘press reset’ and begin again.
This phrase is a great way to sluff off the disappointments, the frustrations, the aggravations or the obstacles from the things that have happened in our lives so far. It is a reminder that staying stuck, for long periods of time, in what is behind us will hold us back.
In a seminar with comedian, motivator and New York Times best-selling author, Andy Andrews, who wrote the book, ‘The Traveler’s Gift: Seven Decisions That Determine Personal Success’, the first decision is: ‘The Buck Stops Here’.
It was quite enlightening to realize that if I wanted anything in my life to change, I had to accept full responsibility for my part in my life so far and realize that I am the one with ultimate responsibility for the decisions in my life.
Although that can be a tough pill to swallow, it was a very eye opening encounter to have a really funny guy standing at the front of the room suggesting to us that we have to accept any role that we might have played in our failed relationships, poor financial, schooling, business or career decisions that had caused us stress.
I remember feeling defeated and shocked that, when I wanted to blame outside circumstances for why my life had not been smooth sailing, I had to instead turn the spot light back toward myself and accept my part. I may have been too passive, or too quick to act or too indecisive or too trusting or too naïve, in my past, that lead me to chaos in my life.
After that seminar I remember needing to journal for hours about what, ‘The Buck Stops Here’ meant in my life. It was profound and extremely helpful to me, in the long run.
That experience was like taking over the steering wheel and becoming the driver of a car, when I had always allowed someone else to do the driving. I eventually felt empowered and excited that if I didn’t like circumstances or situations about my life that I was the one in control of changing the direction.
Coupled with ‘Pressing Reset’, ‘The Buck Stops Here’ concept propelled me to stop being a victim in my life and begin to see the world with a new lens and perspective and test the theory of psychologically starting fresh and beginning anew.
Since I often say that we spend more time picking out a pair of new sunglasses than contemplating the direction of our life, it can be an energizing concept that at any given moment we can shift how we feel about our lives.
I remember a young woman who approached me following one of my seminars. She really wanted to move to California. She was so torn because she had a long list of reasons why that was not possible. Despite the reasons, she had this burning desire in her heart, although she was feeling defeated that she didn’t see a way for this to actually happen.
If your life is perfect and fulfilling and wonderful and happy and healthy then keep doing what you are doing and keep up the great work! If not, there is hope.
Life is an exciting journey of growing and getting to know ourselves and becoming more of who we are truly meant to be, inside and out. It is about realizing our own gifts and strengths and interests and passions and using the experiences and pain our lives to move us forward.
We will always have challenges and obstacles and pain and stress in our daily lives; however, we can use those trials and difficulties to grow who we are and allow what will bring us peace and joy, to surface.
We are meant to be fulfilled and feel moments of happiness. Even though it may not feel that way in your life, this just means you are being nudged to do things differently or discover your next phase.
We are unhappy and angry and depressed and unmotivated when we are on the verge of transition. This is happening so that we will make new decisions to be healthier, more authentic to who we really are or closer to what we truly want.
This doesn’t mean that we have to quit our jobs, leave our relationships, move out of town or join a monastery. It means that we can make a new decision to be happier or healthier.
Any moment of our lives we can ‘press reset’. Once we make the decision of what concept we want to work toward, there will be a momentum that can carry us to the next step. We don’t necessarily have to know how; we just have to decide what…
By the way, the young woman connected with me years later. She is a married mom, has a very successful career and has been living in California for years. She recalled me saying that she didn’t have to know all of the details of ‘how’; that she just had to decide ‘what’…
What is your ‘what’?
‘When I was 19 years old, both of my parents died in the same year; my mom of cancer and my dad in a car accident. Through the next two or three years and a series of bad decisions – all my own, I might add – I ended up literally homeless, before that was even a word. I even slept occasionally under a pier on the Gulf Coast.’ ~ Andy Andrews: The Traveler’s Gift Author (www.AndyAndrews.com)
Disclaimer. This article in no way replaces the advice, treatment or care from therapists or mental health care professionals and is intended for entertainment and enlightenment purposes only. Please feel free to ignore every word of this weekly, Sunday column, or perhaps use it in some small way to improve the quality of your life. Thank you for reading and have a great day!